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Veterinarian Turns Family Therapist to Practice at Online Portal

Janette Strokappe

 

Veterinarian Turns Family Therapist to Practice at Online Portal

Jan was a small animal veterinarian until illness ended this career. After recovering she went back to school and became a marital and family therapist and registered psychologist. Now she opens her online clinic at ProvenTherapy.com.

Janette Strokappe – Online Counselor and Therapist

PRESS RELEASE: AlbertaApril 8, 2016PRLog — She did not see this as much of a jump as she realized she liked talking to people as much as she liked the animals. Because of her many years of making a diagnosis on an animal that couldn’t talk to her, Jan is very intuitive, which has been very helpful in her work with clients. Her first job was with Alberta Health Services where she spent six years working with children and adolescents and their families. She then became the clinical head of the crisis team. Jan then worked with a non-profit Christian counselling ministry where she worked with individuals, couples and families.

Jan finds that online therapy is a way to bring service to a wider group who prefer not to go to a therapist’s office. She works hard to build the same rapport with the client that she creates in person. Jan works collaboratively with the client to have them realize that they have many strengths and resources that have always been present but may have been unused for a while.  Jan also believes that no one is hopeless.

Her particular interest is trauma arising from the family of origin. Jan believes that trauma is held in the body and interferes with life moving forward smoothly and causing problems with relationships and work. Jan teaches relaxation and coping skills before any trauma work is done.

She uses mainly cognitive behavioural therapy and dialectical behaviour therapy, which she hopes to practice through the premier online counseling portal https://www.proventherapy.com. What Jan’s goal for the client is for the client to realize that the critical voice in their head comes from a difficult childhood and has no place in adulthood. Jan works collaboratively with the client to address the anxiety and depression which usually arise in such situations. This baggage from childhood can affect parenting and often goes with the client as baggage in the marriage.

Read full story here…

Family Meetings

Janette Strokappe

 

Relevance of Family Meetings

Expert advice by veteran Family Therapist and Psychologist

Janette Strokappe – Online Counselor and Therapist

I work a lot with children and their families. The biggest complaint I get from parents is about the disrespect and arguing over doing chores. I strongly recommend no arguing with children, especially teenagers. That is a fool’s game. I would tell any child being disrespectful; you can talk to me when you are willing to talk to me respectfully. I would then disengage.

Instead I recommend monthly family meetings, more often if an emergency arises. These meetings are scheduled and everyone in the family attends, and there are no interruptions allowed. This is our time to talk about how the family is doing, and the children have a say.

We talk about who does what. Chores are assigned according to age. Even very little children can take their dirty dishes to the sink. Older children must realize that the little guys cannot do as much as they can, and that the day will come for the little guys as well.

I don’t recommend consequences for young children. I like behaviour charts where the children can mark down when they have completed a chore. This is done with a star or little sticker just to make it more fun. At the end of the week, if the chart is full, they get to pick the Saturday night video or what the family will be having for Saturday night supper. They do not get an expensive gift.

For children with ADHD, sometimes they need to see the reward before they will work for it. For these children I would make up a little treasure chest of things from the dollar store so the child can see the prize. If they complete chores as agreed upon, they get to pick one thing.

FamilyThere are three things to remember about chores. First, the parent should demonstrate what they are looking for in, for example, a clean bedroom. Too many times, I have had kids tell me that they will clean the bedroom and mum or dad will say, “That’s not good enough”, but never explain why. The parent has to demonstrate what a clean bedroom looks like. Also putting things away properly, and what do they have to do for the parent to decide the bedroom has been cleaned properly. Is a clean bedroom, all the clothes put away properly, and nothing shoved under the bed?

The second thing is how many days a chore has to be done to get the privilege at the end of the week. Is it 5 out of 7, 7 out of 7. This is decided at the family meeting.

Thirdly, a time limit has to be set on the chore. Does the garbage have to be emptied by 6 o’clock in the evening?

We do make exceptions for special occasions. With our own children, mum and dad covered the chores if the child had a party or a concert. However, if the child wants to take on a sport where they need to attend once or twice a week, this has to be decided at the family meeting, so chores can be discussed again.

With older children, we use consequences. By that I mean removed privileges. Consequences need to be immediate and appropriate. We do not tell children that they can’t watch next week’s game. Instead it must be immediate. The consequence has to happen tonight. We don’t take away the European trip they have been planning for two years with the school.

Children get to have a say in what the consequence will be. If it is losing the phone, then the decision is for how long. If it is not playing video games for a day, then the computer, laptops, tablets and phones have to be turned over.

If the parents set consequences, then they must follow through. Parents must never undermine one another. If a consequence has been agreed upon, then both parents must support one another to make sure it happens.

What are the exceptions? If the family has been away for the weekend, having fun at a sport or just doing things together, we do not tell children to do chores the minute they walk in the door. The same goes for a teenager that has just played at a music competition, participated in the science fair or played in a sports tournament; we do not tell them “you’ve had your fun, now do your chores”. We savor the good times with them. Chores can wait until tomorrow, unless the dog needs to go outside.

Meet Janette Strokappe here for further support

Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist from California Joins the ProvenTherapists Team

Janeen Wilson, a qualified and experienced Family Therapist and Counselor has started her online counseling clinic at ProvenTherapy.com. She is available to potential clients for individual and couples therapy through live chat or email service.

JaneenPress Release – 21 Nov. 2014: Janeen Wilson, a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in the state of California (August 2006) has a Bachelor’s Degree in Psychology and a Master’s degree in Counseling Psychology. Janeen began practicing therapy in 2000 working with a variety of different therapeutic issues and problems. Janeen initially began working with women in Domestic Violence and with adolescent boys struggling with psychiatric issues, bipolar issues and attachment disruption that were in a Residential Treatment setting. Janeen has worked with all ages of children in school based settings and their families addressing issues related to family dynamics, ADHD and emotional disruption. Janeen became very interested in an strength based evidence approach (Multi Dimensional Foster Care) and was formally trained as a Program Director and Family Therapist through this program (MTFC). With this training she focused on assisting families in reuniting youth from foster care back to their homes and strengthening their family systems. She has also worked with families as the Director of the Family Stabilization Team in Boston, MA to prevent youth from being removed from their home, as an Outpatient Therapist and with specialized populations such as the blind. Janeen has worked with a variety of different types of people in different areas, ranging from the tundra in Alaska to urban Boston, rural and urban Pennsylvania as well as in Southern California.

Issues Janeen has worked with ranges from working with the blind community, SED children and their families, Adoption, Foster Care, as well as Addiction and Trauma. Janeen has also been formally trained to work with firefighters to address their specific needs related to work and trauma.

For the last two years Janeen has been working as a Individual and Family therapist in an inpatient dual diagnosis residential setting for individuals struggling with addiction and mental health/trauma issues. Now she has opened her virtual clinic at https://www.proventherapy.com.

Read full press release here…

Another Facelift Cheers Up Online Therapists – Press Release

Press Release published in PRLog regarding the release of the upgraded site and launching new features.

Press ReleaseThe new upgraded site with sophisticated chat application received huge applause from the service users as well as professional counselors. The new site which launched on Thursday, 9th May claimed to have more facilities than its competitors.

ProvenTherapy.com has been there on the cyber world for many years, providing ‘healing touch to troubled hearts and souls’ according to its previous business slogan. Now it has 80 approved ProvenTherapists practising 24X7 and the number is growing.

Last week the virtual clinic launched its new website along with highly sophisticated chat application for use by service users as well as Therapists. The new chat application reported to have many new features:

* Flash based live chat application with high speed and real time simulation
* Live text chat and live voice chat with excellent audio clarity
* Application run from dedicated server to ensure maximum bandwidth support
* Interactive whiteboard to make therapeutic communication effective and powerful
* Online access to verbatim (full counseling script) for Therapists and Clients any time
* Clients are offered two fee models – fee per session, and fee per minute
* Peer support facility for Therapists
* Notes keeping facility for Therapists
* Clients forum for sharing issues anonymously for Therapists to respond

The premier online counseling and psychotherapy service has changed its business tag line to ‘online counseling for life’s journey’ with the aim of adding positive color to its healing mission.

Read full story here

 

Press Release: Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Goes Live on ProvenTherapy.com

Arthur Belmont, a California based marriage and family therapist joins the team of professionals giving online counseling service through ProvenTherapy.com, one of the leading online counseling and psychotherapy clinic on the Internet.

The virtual online counseling and psychotherapy clinic for mental health, marriage, and relationship problems https://www.ProvenTherapy.com has a team of more than 60 Approved ProvenTherapists extending ‘healing touch to the troubled hearts and souls’ through online counseling and psychotherapy services. The professional therapists provide counseling and psychotherapy support through live chat, telephone, and email methods round the clock, seven days a week. Arthur Belmont, a licensed independant counselor and psychotherapist, is the latest addition to the team of ProvenTherapists who has 18 years of experience in the therapy field.

Arthur H. Belmont is a licensed Marriage & Family Therapist (LMFT) who has been practicing psychotherapy since 1995. He received his M.S. degree in Counseling from California State University, Long Beach and his B.A. degree in Communications from Temple University in Philadelphia. Arthur is currently practicing in San Diego, California and maintains his licensure in both Florida and California.

Read full story here…

Whose Children?

Sharanya Dinesh

Approved ProvenTherapist

Sharanya Dinesh - ProvenTherapist Khalil Gibran is my favorite poet and philosopher; this is what he wrote about children:‘Your children are not your children.They are the sons and daughters of life’s longing for itself.

Contact Sharanya for Counseling and Parenting Support

Your children are temporarily in your custody and you are their guardian and care taker. You have no ownership rights over them because they are owned by God and He has sent them to accomplish a goal or a purpose unique to them. Life called out for them and here they are, as your children in name and form but His children in verity. The animals and the birds seem to understand this philosophy much better than the intelligent human race. The lioness feeds the cub and simultaneously encourages the cub to fend for itself. The chicks are also urged to fly and gather twigs from a very young age. We humans keep missing this fine point somehow.They come through you but not from you,And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.He again says, they come from you; yes, you do give birth to them, yet they are from Him alone and not from you, which is what most parents mistakenly take claim for. The children stay with us as long as it is destined and not a single moment beyond that. They are with us but they do not belong to us; they are definitely not the personal property of parents.You may give them your love but not your thoughts,For they have their own thoughts.Again so true, did we, as children think like our parents? Did we not have different thoughts, dreams, aspirations and ambitions? Did we not wait for the day when we would be able to live ‘our’ life, the way we want to, without being told, what to do, what to eat, what to wear and a seamless stream of instructions? If that was generation gap then, should not the gap be more gaping and wider now? Times have changed very dramatically over the last 2 decades and with it a very tumultuous parent age has arrived. Love is scarce or showered as a return gift for something well done or withheld as punishment at times. The present day children are facing more insecure times, it is all the more important that we shower as much love as we can on them and give them the freedom of thought. Raise them such that they are free with discipline and love.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.  Healthy Parenting
Almost every child achieves much more than what their parents did. They belong to the tomorrow and have to learn from today, whereas we belong to a yesterday, trying to adjust to today for a better tomorrow. We are yet to get a grip over the way times have changed, whereas they are already of this generation. They are planning and dreaming of a tomorrow which we may never see. Is it fair to drag them backwards in time, to our times and force them to think our way, do our way, live our way? We can be like the lamp post guiding and throwing light on the path, we cannot walk that path though. They have to walk their own path and discover their destiny.You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

I initially never agreed with this line, why should the parents be like the children? My parents always wanted me to emulate either one of them and that is exactly what I have done. So why should my son (I need to remember, he is HIS son, not mine) not emulate his Dad or me? Why should we not ask him to try and become like his father or mother? The next line has the answer though; because, life has never gone backwards and time does not wait or depend on a yesterday. It is today and then tomorrow. I woke up to the fact that if I expect my son to become like his father or me, I would be asking him to move backwards, live in a yesterday. As a parent I should be asking him to look at his tomorrow, move on the road ahead and achieve his dreams. Is it fair on my part to ask him to live my unaccomplished dreams and achievements?

You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth.

The parents are the bows from which the children of God as living arrows are set forth in search of their destiny.

The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.

The archer or God has already marked the path over which the arrow, the child, will fly. God simply wants that the Bow, parents, also to bend, yield, string themselves just so much so that the arrow, child, can reach its destined goal. It is the strength of the bow and the flexibility of the string which allows the archer to set forth the arrow swift and far.

Let you bending in the Archer’s hand be for gladness;

For even as He loves the arrow that flies,

So He loves also the bow that is stable. ’

One without the other is incomplete and God loves both equally. He has assigned us the job of taking care of His children and entrusted us with the big responsibility of raising them happily and with joy. Bend yield listen to the child and nourish them with love and joy, God does send forth His children through you and is happy to see them ascend, but He also loves the stable hand of the parent which joyfully raises its offspring.

As a child counselor by profession I am forced to read this poem to every parent because they all invariably expect me, the counselor, to change the mindset of the child. They look me at me very expectantly as if I can wave a magic wand and their errant child will start obeying them or start behaving the way they expect the child to behave.

MARRIAGE – Happy despite the challenges

Sharanya Dinesh

Approved ProvenTherapist

Sharanya Dinesh - ProvenTherapist I am an ardent fan of Khalil Gibran; a poet, philosopher, visionary, saint ….I run out of eulogies when I need to describe this one person. This page is dedicated to him, in the sense I will be writing his poems and try to understand them with you all. Each of us sees the same thing with a unique individual perception. Help understand this great prophet better…

Contact Sharanya for Marriage and Relationship Counseling

He writes:

Aye, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God. But, let there be spaces in togetherness.
Love one another but make not a bond of love
Let your love be a moving sea between the shores of your souls. Fill each other’s cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf. Sing and dance together and be joyous,
But let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
Give your heart but not into each other’s keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
Stand together yet not too near together.
For the pillars of the temple stand apart, and the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow.

Beautiful, is it not? A few lines to aptly describe the way a couple can live together happily! A marriage is not about merging with each other! How can two different people merge? It would mean a loss of identity for the partner who is making all the changes or accommodating more. This only results in bitterness and shows its ugly face at the most unexpected stage of married life.

Can an oak tree and the cypress tree be called oak tree? We need to walk hand in hand towards the same goal. Like the train tracks, each one independent yet dependent and very imperative for the smooth running of the train. The train carries so many people every day to their respective destinations and achieves its own milestones because of these two tracks on which it confidently chugs away. When the tracks need to meet and change the direction of the train they do meet and again mutually stay together at a little distance.

Couples too need to retain their individuality, take decisions together and let life stay on course with the partners holding hands and walking in forward n the same direction. Give your love to your spouse but safe guard your heart. That is for the creator! We humans forget this truth. We shower everything on each other. And breathe down each other’s neck! Too much proximity brings in claustrophobia. We are meant for each other and God brought us together for some purpose. Our individual goals and our destiny together are as designed by God. We forget the creator, the purpose of our lives and ourselves too. We begin trying to merge; with unmet expectations end up on different shores with a sea of misunderstandings between us.

He says that we all need time to introspect, be alone and ponder about ourselves. The pillars of the temple stand apart and are home to the God inside and to the thousands of devotees praying to the Lord. The couples should support each other, help each other and learn from each other. The Oak tree and Cyprus tree do not grow in each other’s shadow.